Random Things I Do/Do Not Hate

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Friday, December 30, 2005

awsome movie reviews

This is to be the first in my list of AWSOME MOVIE REVIEWS! I chose this to be first as it displays some of the key elements of a good Bad Kung Fu movie, bad dialog, most life altering experiances happen moments befor the camera starts rolling (In this case, the main character's family was murdered by the villian & he was introduced as he was running through the woods being chased by nameless henchmen) a comical Kung Fu master who saves the main character, Ninjas in China for no particular reason, a Samurai in the wrong costume & hair, & finally, a scene on the cover that never happened in the movie (the guy with throwing stars stuck in his eyes).

The first misdemenor of the story was very early in the film, the main character saves the ill dressed samurai from certain doom from a number of Kung Fu masters he had beaten earlier, & then the relationship between the two is never heard of again until the final climactic battle. The the next crossed wire is when, during the opening monologue, the narrator (who disapears for the rest of the film) refears to the temple as The Shaolin Temple, however, Shaolin is a Religion, so it should be a Shaolin temple. On several occasions, one character has already moved his hand to block an attack before the other throws it.
several scenes involving people jumping very high (ie. into trees) are obviously filmed in reverse.

In total I would give this movie 4 Drunken Staffs out of 5, I suggest everyone go out & see this movie, reguardless if you want to or not.


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